When most people think of fear, they conjure pictures of screaming women in slasher movies, horrible mindless villains, or heroes chased by zombies. But, for most of us, fear feels more like an insidious virus that our minds and emotions create to stop us from moving forward.
Fear is the mind/ego's way of saying "I'm not going there! I like being right where I am. I'm familiar with my current state. If I plunk myself right down here, nothing can hurt me because I already know this territory. I'm not worthy and if I stretch myself, I might get rejected."
Fear means you are not willing to venture into the unknown, not willing to take risk, not willing to accept and adjust to change. Fear is about ignoring imperatives to change, putting your head in the sand and expecting the problem to go away, allowing others to control your life because you may not have the courage or confidence to control your own. And fear always leaves your life messy, miserable, and myopic (limited in scope.)
You may not actually be aware of the grip fear has over you. And even if you are, you sometimes feel powerless to change because of past, tightly held beliefs.
But fear can be your ally. If you feel it, it is a siren call to change! When you bump up against fear, you know you are called to move forward, be bolder, take a well-calculated risk, flow with the change imposed on you, make the course correction you've been resisting, cross the seemingly impenetrable barrier, strike out on your own, act in your own self-interest, or reach for freedom!
Fear means you are not willing to venture into the unknown, not willing to take risk, not willing to accept and adjust to change. Fear is about ignoring imperatives to change, putting your head in the sand and expecting the problem to go away, allowing others to control your life because you may not have the courage or confidence to control your own.
So how can you move beyond it to something better when fear is at your door?
1. The flipside of fear is faith. If you are experiencing fear, then something is pressing you to change. Where does that urgency for change originate- in your heart, in your spirit, in the Universe? If it originates in the Universe, your heart and your spirit are indeed pushing you forward. Let go and trust. Allow your faith to spring forward. Ask if this change is in your highest good. If the answer is "yes," then trust the Universe to allow the benefits to unfold once you give up resisting and start moving forward. If the pressure is mounting from outside-job loss, relationship breakup, and so on-again ask if this is in your highest good? These conditions are the Universe speaking to you in the dialect of "loving change and redirection."
Trust and go with the flow.
2. Affirming "I am FEAR-LESS!" Whenever I get overwhelmed by fear, I repeat this affirmation again and again. I repeat it with power as if I were brandishing a wooden stake in order to ward off a vampire! My confidence grows and the fear lessens as I remind myself that I have no reason to fear because I am a fearless being with the Ultimate Support System!
3. Get clear. If part of your fear is confusion about what steps to take or where to head, spend time in silence asking questions. Reach out to someone else who can coach you through the process of getting clear or put your options in writing. These are just some of the ways you can get focused, so that with clear intention you can begin loosening the grip of fear.
4. What is the worst thing that could happen if you do move forward? Usually you will have built up this fear into something greater than it could possibly ever be in reality. When you really look at the worst thing that could happen, it's usually not all that terrible. Then it's a simple realization that moving forward easily outweighs your realistic worst-case scenario.
Voilà, paralysis unblocked!
5. Bring it out into the light. The more you look at fear from an objective standpoint, as if you were not in your body-bring it out, hold it to the light, examine why it's making you crazy-the more power you have to eradicate the fear of it you are harboring. Think of yourself as the sleuth bringing the clues out into the open so you can solve the case.
6. Recalibrate your limiting beliefs and go for expansion. Look at the beliefs that are causing you to hold onto your fear. What's real, what's not? Make a list of these limiting concepts. Then list the opposite possibility-the expansionist and unlimited belief that you could be holding-the one that would enable you to move forward with confidence and courage.
Get clear. If part of your fear is confusion about what steps to take or where to head, spend time in silence asking questions. Reach out to someone else who can coach you through the process of getting clear or put your options in writing.
7. Stop thinking about what you're giving up and start looking at what you are potentially gaining. What's the upside? This is an easy one! Ultimately moving toward your highest good will always have a greater potential upside than staying where you are, or giving up what you currently have.
8. Talk it out. Find a forward-thinking and positive friend, someone who is used to stepping through fear, or perhaps a counselor or coach. Talk about what you are feeling. Ask that person to tell you stories of how he or she found success by moving beyond fear. Be inspired by other people's courageous acts.
9. Fear is just thoughts and emotions-those can be changed! Fear is just something you created in your mind. It is not real. It is simply a virtual prison that you can choose to make disappear by hitting the delete button!
10. Stop clinging and start living-embrace the unknown! Life is an exciting e-ticket ride with everything you want if you will simply embrace the unknown.
But if you persist on clinging to the known, you'll never experience it. Greet the unknown future with a warm welcome and magical things start to happen.
11. Consciously create/visualize the outcome. Once you release fear and unwaveringly commit to change, you can help secure a positive future by Consciously Creating it. Make sure you are operating in a high frequency, create your visualization, postmark it to the Universe and then let it go with a blessing of gratitude! Fear has a way of fading in the wake of action and purpose.
The more you look at fear from an objective standpoint, as if you were not in your body-bring it out, hold it to the light, examine why it's making you crazy-the more power you have to eradicate the fear of it you are harboring.
Jackie Lapin tours the world teaching Practical Conscious Creation. She is the bestselling author of "The Art of Conscious Creation; How You Can Transform the World" and "Practical Conscious Creation: Daily Techniques to Manifest Your Desires." To learn more about Jackie Lapin, visit www.jackielapin.com or go to www.LifeWisdomNetwork.com
Do you know of other techniques to cope with fear? - Tell us below!